In one of the previous articles, we’ve talked about the period in which you need to give some room to yourself but also your partner. When you decide that the time of not getting into a contact is over and that you actually want your ex back, it’s time to get on the first step. How can we achieve “yes” when it comes to going out again with your ex, but also how can we stir emotions once again?
Step No. 1 – get in a contact
If you ever wondered why the period of not getting in contact is important, you’ll get it now. Enough time has gone and your ex probably wonders what has happened, why aren’t you calling or letting him know with whom you are. It is exactly what you’ve tried to reach, my dear. Now it’s time for the first step. Get in contact with him. But make sure you’re prepared for the option that your plan to bring him back may not work. After all, you cannot force someone on something he doesn’t want to. You need to be sure you’ve recovered from the breakup, made something positive for yourself, brought back the energy and also had fun during that “time off”.
How to get him into contact?
Simply – text him. A written note is a better option than a call. When he sees your name on his phone, perhaps he may freak out, and you also risk the possibility of not returning your call. But texting enables both of you to think carefully about the content of the message, the tone etc. Your messages should be short. It should be funny, and by all means, do not mention your breakup. You don’t want to push him away immediately. Also, don’t send him love messages or argue with him. So messages like: Hi! How are you? I miss you, I want you back are not the option. It’s better you approach him by saying how something has reminded you of them and nice moments you had together. If it is possible, you can casually mention that you are having a good time and that you’ve been meeting different people lately. Here’s another tip – say something like: “I’ve just been to that restaurant where we first met and it reminded me of you.”
Step No. 2 – ask him out
The next step is to ask him out. Make it casually saying a thing like: We could go out for a coffee sometimes, right? In the beginning, your ex could hesitate, so push him a little bit. Say something like: It’s just coffee. Don’t dare to call your date a date. It will instantly drive him away. Besides, put yourself in his shoes. As soon as you speak the word you can hear the alarms turning on. If he rejects you, don’t push it, you don’t want to lose your dignity.
On a date (we’ll call it that way, just between us), be relaxed, joyful and fun. Talk about funny topics and never mention your break up or how you’ve felt when you were together. The point is to win that person again.
Whatever the outcome, you need to believe it’s the best one for you. There is really a reason for everything. You can always say that you’ve at least tried and that you didn’t lose anything by trying (except for some patience and nerves). And if the plan works, congratulations! Try not to make the same mistakes twice and work on them. Ignore those people who don’t believe in second chances. If you feel it is possible, then it really is, but the most important thing is YOU believe in it.
Translation: G. Dujmović